clothesaholic

Clothes on Film: An Education

2009-12-11T11:50:00.001-08:00

Carey Mulligan and Peter Sarsgaard

I've written plenty of posts about Great Clothes in Lousy Movies, and its subset, Great Clothes on Lousy Actresses. This is not one of those posts. An Education is a damn good movie -- even if the incredible self-possession of the 16-year-old heroine is slightly hard to believe -- made better by its incredible attention to period detail, in particular, the fabulous clothes.

The movies is about Jenny, a school girl whose goal (and her parent's dearest wish) is to get into Oxford. Other than some problems with, horribile dictu!, Latin, Jenny is right on track until she's picked up by a mysterious, totally amoral older man who introduces her to the things she really wants to learn about -- good food, jazz bars, anything French, especially Paris, and sex. He also introduces her to his equally amoral friends, and of course, being amoral (as well as immoral) they have the best taste in clothes, art and interior decoration. They get Jenny out of her school uniform and into brocade sheaths, and they take her to Paris . . . but not before Emma Thompson steals the show with her cameo as the very moral principal of Jenny's school. Complications ensue, lessons are learned, and as a result An Education received an astonishing 94% approval rate at rottentomatoes.com.

The movie takes place in 1961. I adore the clothes of that period because they combine the extremely elegant with the slightly tarty. The image was every woman as mistress, instead of every woman as booty call. I prefer mistress; at least one could expect a detour to Paris on the road to perdition.

Odile Dicks-Mireaux did the wardrobe for the film. Carey Mulligan is the much-praised (and very busy) actress who plays the teenaged Jenny and wears all those clothes so well.

Here's another one!!!

2009-11-19T11:11:00.000-08:00

This floral-print, bias-cut chiffon dress is for sale at Dandelion Vintage. It's also in a wearable size, bust 34, waist 28, hips 40. Nice.

Clothes on Film: Hilda Crane

2009-11-17T12:33:00.000-08:00

Jean Pierre Aumont and Jean Simmons in "Hilda Crane"

Jean Simmons & Evelyn Varden in "Hilda Crane"

While I was eating breakfast this morning I turned on the TV and caught the last 45 minutes of Hilda Crane also known as The Many Loves of Hilda Crane. I missed the many loves, instead coming in on Hilda's wedding day, when she was refusing the her future mother-in-law's bribe of $50,000 to leave her momma's-boy fiancé at the altar. Any modern viewer will conclude that Hilda should have taken the money and run away with the sexy Frenchman, especially after mean Momma calls her a tramp, but while Hilda's life-choices may have been less than perfect, her wardrobe choices were not. In 1956, the twice-divorced Hilda couldn't wear white at wedding number three, so instead she was wearing the most divine pale yellow full-skirted dress with a surplice bodice and dolman sleeves. To die!

As with many mid-Fifties Hollywood morality-tales, Hilda Crane's wardrobe is much better than its soapy plot. Hilda's full dresses (which she apparently donned after returning to her hometown to recapture her respectability) looked not only glamorous but, with the exception of the wasp-waist, comfortable. A loose dolman-sleeved bodice creates no titscrepancy, and there's absolutely no danger that the world will become the gynecologist of a woman wearing a calf-length four-gore skirt. Waists can always be let out if there's a big enough seam allowance. And there's nothing like a group of angry women in full dresses having a flounce-and-swish-off.

1950s diagonal closing dress from So Vintage Patterns

1950s Coachman's Robe pattern at Heavens to Betsey Vintage

195os dolman-sleeve shirtdress sold by Sew Cool Rock n Roll

The dresses reminded me of bathrobes, and in fact one of the vintage patterns I found that most resembled what Hilda et al. were wearing, the one from Heavens to Betsey Vintage, is in fact a pattern for a robe. A lot of damn robe.

Oh, poor Hilda, all she wanted was to be loved in a pure and honorable way, with no mother-in-laws to call her a tramp, and no French professors to call her a courtesan. Because, "[i]n case you don't know what 'courtesan' means, it's just a fancy word for 'tramp'!" (So said Hilda.)

*ETA: The costume designer on this movie was Charles Le Maire, who has a long, long, list of credits, including "All About Eve," and "The Diary of Ann Frank," and who was nominated for an Oscar 16 times and who won three, and about whom I know nothing except what IMDB provides. How did I miss this guy?

Look at this beauty!!!

2009-11-18T09:09:00.001-08:00

1930s silk chiffon dress

This quintessentially 1930s ruffled silk chiffon dress is for sale at Mystique Vintage Clothing. It's in an unusually wearable size for a depression-era dress -- bust 36, waist 32, hips 40. Most women's clothes of that era are so narrow they look like they were made for skinny 10-year-old girls. That narrow profile probably explains the popularity of the bias-cut, hip- and-belly-clinging fashions of the time. No woman who actually has hips and a belly wants them emphasized.

The narrow Norma Shearer in cling.

For your further 1930s viewing pleasure, check out the pattern illustrations at Christine's 1930 page. For example:

Floral print, check. Flounces, check. Narrow, check. 1930s fashion, YEAA!!!

Clothes on T.V.

2009-08-26T20:30:00.000-07:00

Yes, Project Runway is back, in spades and in bulk: specials and the show and a spinoff and all sorts of extras online. It's no wonder Lifetime is working the show like crazy, considering that the channel's other programing consists entirely of reruns of Reba, Will & Grace, and, no kidding, Cybill. All it needed was reruns of The Golden Girls and Lifetime could have changed its name to the Nursing Home Channel. At least with PR and its spinoff, Models of the Runway, viewers in the über-desirable 24-54 demographic -- and I -- will tune in to Lifetime for at least an hour and a half every week.

Anyway, the show looks good, the contestants are interesting, and Tim Gunn is still a style god. I enjoyed the first show even though the garments the designers produced were pretty boring, and I was floored when Lindsay Lohan was trotted out as the guest judge. Lindsay Lohan, she of the tights and lateral boobage, a fashion expert! Can't say that wasn't entertainment, though.

Been there, done that.

I'm sure the show will get better as the season progresses, too. The first few episodes of all these reality shows have too many unknown people throwing too much unfamiliar -- or too familiar -- stuff at the screen to really engage me. And I insist upon being engaged. Make it work, people!

I really enjoyed the first episode of The Rachel Zoe Project, Season 2(hereinafter TRZP2) because it featured lots of dresses, and some of them really, really great dresses. Rachel was dressing five stars for the Golden Globes, and our girl did good:

Demi Moore in Armani Privé

Debra Messing in Vera Wang

Eva Mendes in Dior

Cameron Diaz in Chanel Couture

Anne Hathaway in Armani Privé

The big drama was over the pink Chanel Couture dress worn by Cameron Diaz. Rachel not only wanted it shipped to L.A. from Paris, she wanted it altered to remove the cap sleeve on the runway look. But lo! The dress arrived on time for Cameron to wear, and, apparently, roll around in the limo until that beautiful garment was crumpled like a plastic bag. I preferred it on the hanger.

I confess I don't understand why so many beautiful women in Hollywood (and I have to admit that they're all beautiful, even the ones I don't like *cough* Lindsay *cough*)) have such hard dressing themselves, but, alas, they do. Are there no full-length mirrors in Celebrity Land? Whatever, stylists need jobs too.

Oh, this is fun. Pictures of "Rachel Zoe Through the Years." Heavy on the vintage, unfortunately uncredited. I think looks 5 and 16 are vintage Halston, look 24 is vintage Stephen Burrows, and looks 14 and 25 are vintage Pucci. Any other guesses?

Pretty in Prints

2009-09-27T13:28:00.001-07:00

I love big, splashy, happy prints. In fact, the last dress I bought was done in a huge pink and orange floral print on a bright yellow background that could easily double as hazard flag in a marine emergency, or as an accent pillow in a domestic one. There's a lot to make me happy in the Spring 2010 collections, U.S. and European. In the near future the Fug Girls will probably be accusing a lot of celebrities of dressing like couches, but why should couches have all the fun?

Rochas Spring 2010

Kenzo Spring 2010

Giles Spring 2010

Dries van Noten Spring 2010

Etro Spring 2010

Tracy Reese Spring 2010

DKNY Spring 2010

Dennis Basso Spring 2010

The variety of prints is great, too: Dries van Noten and Kenzo did ethnic looks, designers as diverse as Anna Sui and Rochas, did florals, and there were abstracts all over the place. Even the print haters should find something to love.

Anatomy of a Fashion Fantasy

2009-11-12T07:08:00.000-08:00

This picture of Lady Gaga, wearing designer granny panties and a lace bag over her head, was all over the fashion blogs last week, only to be superseded by photos of fellow performance-dresser Lily Allen at the something-or-other awards. Some people loved the Gaga look, some people hated it, and I wondered, again, why people go all fashion police over clothing worn by pop/rock/country stars. Music types aren't supposed to dress like civilians, and when they feel pressured to attempt fashion, they turn into ridiculous frumps. Witness the red carpet at the recent CMA awards.

Anyhoo . . . Lady Gaga is Dada, she's supposed to look absurd. What's more, even a five-year-old knows that her look is all self-promotion. So, as far as I'm concerned, screw her, her critics, her Marc Jacob's undies and her towering Alexander McQueen clodhoppers, but please, save those fantastic tights . . .

I love hose, I wear hose, I think hose flatters all legs, but particularly those of a woman-of-a-certain age who can't spend days out of every week being waxed, tanned and buffed in order to go bare-legged even in the middle of winter, in other words, me. And seeing these tights, I had an immediate vision of the outfit they should be worn with and the woman who would wear it:

The look starts with a late 40's/early 50's style nip-waist suit in a pale gray, cream or mauve:

Vintage Vogue Pattern

Alberta Ferretti Pre-Fall 2009

Christian Dior Pre-Fall 2009

Yves Saint Laurent Pre-Fall 2009

. . . worn over nothing more than a whisper of silk . . .

La Perla chemise

. . . and a spritz or two of Diorissimo.

Add a pair of pale peep-toe platform shoes (blending the color of tights and shoes lengthens the leg, doncha know):

Alexander McQueen

Michael Kors

Steve Madden

Franco Sarto

Heel-height doesn't matter here because the woman wearing this outfit (we'll call her Lady GeeBee) won't be walking. She'll be driven everywhere, in her BMW 760li (eco-pass attached). If the pavement is wet, or there's even a hint of snow on the ground, her chauffeur/bodyguard, who bears a remarkable resemblance to a Daniel Craig that had his ears pinned back at the appropriate age, will carry her to the entrance. And yes, it's okay to wear hose under peep-toe shoes.

A fabulous bag is also required:

Gucci Croissette Bag

Dior Demi Lune Bag

Not that this woman will ever need to do anything as vulgar as carry money. Her extremely competent personal assistant, who accompanies her almost everywhere, and who bears a remarkable resemblance to James McAvoy, attends to all that, like one of the Queen of England's minions. (Although you can be sure that Lady GeeBee checks her bank statements religiously.)

Of course, Lady GeeBee never leaves the house without some elegant, understated, jewelry,

Tiffany Keys

(Damn, those Tiffany keys are sexy. I think I must have one. Time to unload an heirloom or two and trade up.)

Add a silver fox stole (vintage, of course, so Mr. Fluffy isn't sacrificed to vanity, but so Grandpa Fluffy's sacrifice doesn't go to waste), lest an unruly breeze disturb Her Serenity.

One last accessory -- a first-class ticket to New York, London, Paris, or Rome, somewhere said outfit can be appreciated.

The chauffeur and P.A. travel coach.

Back to reality: I was unsuccessful in finding Lady Gaga's tights for sale online, although a Google search for fishnet hose certainly brought me to the most interesting sites. The result of the search for "nip waist suit" was more interesting (translation: smuttier) still. Hello, Gods of the Intardwebs, this is a (mostly) FASHION fantasy I'm having! I'll let y'all know when I'm having the other kind.

Big Bad Bag

2009-11-11T09:52:00.001-08:00

Jean Paul Gaultier hobo bag

I don't have the status bag fetish that obsesses so many fashionistas, but if I did, I'd spend my rent money on this bag, which combines the best of both "bag" and "fetish." I mean, really, how many accessories can go from lunch with the ladies to a steamy rendezvous at your local dungeon?

This handbag is a new item at Zappos, and, at $1321.90, is almost sold out.

Happy handbagging!

UPDATE: The same day I posted the bag disappeared from Zappos, sold out. I guess the economy's not as bad as we thought, eh?

Teh Last of the Pretty

2009-10-16T17:40:00.000-07:00

For the time being. Anyhoo, I give you -- Pretty on the Red Carpet! Some of these looks are probably too low-key and pretty to be worn by actual celebrities, but what the heck, I can dream that some starlet out there will decide that she doesn't want to look like either ho or a float in the parade. However, if one of them should have Rose Parade fantasies, I hope she goes as a Marchesa float . . .

Douglas Hannant Spring 2010

Adam Spring 2010

Carlos Miele Spring 2010

Carolina Herrera Spring 2010

Isaac Mizrahi Spring 2010

Naeem Khan Spring 2010

Stephen Burrows Spring 2010

Zac Posen Spring 2010

Marchesa Spring 2010

I wish that bustle-like swag in the back of that blue and white dress by Douglas Hannant was a real bustle, because that poof doesn't entirely make sense floating between the model's butt and knees. Otherwise I love that entire look, messy hair and all. I can imagine the model as some turn-of-the-century party girl, wandering the garden of a debauched robber baron in the moonlight, stoned on laudanum and champagne, right before meeting a fate worse than death. Now, that's a dress!

The gold gown by Naeem Khan shouldn't be worn for real without a full-length lining, but I'm pretty sure that someone will wear it completely unlined. The Stephen Burrows dress is fresh and happy, but I'm equally sure the very convetional fashion police would hate it. The super-sculptural violet Marchesa probably isn't meant to be worn at all, or at least not worn by a mortal woman who sits down, eats, drinks, or wishes to go to the lady's room without the assistance of two maids. It's a fabulous piece of work, though, isn't it?

Less is More

2009-10-31T19:39:00.000-07:00

Celine Spring 2010

Via Style.com, Vogue Magazine published its list of the 10 best collections of Spring 2010. The usual suspects -- Chanel, Balenciaga, Marc Jacobs, Lavin -- were all on the list, along with Rodarte whose post-apocalyptic deconstructed collection looks rather dated to me in this year of teh Pretty. There was also a name I'd never seen on a top-ten list before, Celine, which has in the past been criticized as too safe and commercial. However Celine is now being designed by Phoebe Philo, a great favorite of both Vogue and mine (we're Philophiles!) who produced a minimalist/military collection that I think is a real stand out among all the ruffles, bunches, gathers and general hoo-ha featured in Vogue's other favorite collections.

Celine Spring 2010

Celine Spring 2010

Celine, Spring 2010

Philo's looks manage to be simple and fashion forward at the same time. I can totally see La Swinton wearing that blue tunic dress over a pair of pants on the red carpet at Cannes.

I also love, love, love the futuristic-by-way-of-ancient-Greece minimalist collection of Osman Yousefzada.

Osman Spring 2010

Osman Spring 2010

Osman Spring 2010

Osman has lots of the stuff I love -- references to 1960s futurism, goddess dresses, baggy pants and a good dose of WWTSW. However it looks like both he and Phoebe went shopping at the same shoe store where they found new and clunkier versions of those cork-soled platform sandals I wore in the 1970s (which, heaven help us, are still being made!) As much as I want to revisit the simple little shift trend of the 60s, I want to avoid the ankle-threatening platform sandal trend of the 70s. There are some things a person just has to grow out of.

The World's Sexiest Raincoat

2009-10-30T10:46:00.000-07:00

From the Spring 2010 Collection of Martin Grant. Yowza. This coat should never be worn with more than sandals and a spray of Chanel No. 5, and never, ever, be worn in the rain.

All looks, Martin Grant Spring 2010

I loved the rest of Grant's minimalist collection, too, even the asymmetrical looks and the jumpsuit-with-the-funny pants. I think his looks are what fashion editors mean by the phrase "clean and modern." Clearly, he can deliver a lot of look without a lot of fuss.

This is what Style.com said about one of Grant's earlier collections: "Grant's clothes were impeccable. Yes, they're Park Avenue grand—perfect for those polite ladies who never have a hair or hemline out of place. That's not to say they won't appeal to younger high-maintenance types too. It might be old-school technique, but the effect was dynamic and contemporary, without any need for gimmicks or fuss."

"Impeccable." That's a good thing.

Michael Kors is Neat.

2009-09-19T09:22:00.000-07:00

Michael Kors' collections are often (maybe always) vintage inspired, which of course I think is great. He claimed he was thinking about architecture when he designed his Spring 2010 collection, but I see retro-futuristic (okay, architectural) André Courrèges , which makes me a very happy Clothesaholic indeed.

1960s Vintage André Courrèges

Kors showed neat, structured, coats and dresses, simple shapes, lots of white, space-age zippering, cut-outs and top stiching. There were no gowns at all, instead, Kors did separates and short dresses for cocktail and evening. His collection really stood out in a season where teh pretty trend produced lots of soft, ruffled, fluttery clothes, but the clothes were still on trend because they were done in beautiful soft colors.

All Michael Kors Spring 2010

And while we're on the subject of Mr. Kors, I didn't realize how much he contributed to Project Runway until this season, when he's mostly absent. The show needs his taste and acid wit to stay on track, because right now it's an exercise in bland. Producers, hear me!!!

Run! Oh, no, you can't . . .

2009-10-07T12:52:00.000-07:00

Shoes from Alexander McQueen's Spring 2010 collection. Way to harsh my pretty buzz, Alex.

Pretty in the White House

2009-10-04T19:25:00.000-07:00

Jason Wu Spring 2010

Fashion Week Month is over, or almost over, and I've only just peeked at the London, Milan and Paris collections. The designers showing in those cities are still doing edgier looks, which, frankly, look a little five minutes ago to me. Fashionistas been parading around in origami-ed, asymetrical, sheer, crotch-revealing creations for several years now, and it's time for teh pretty everywhere.

Meanwhile, Shelly O has been out and about, with her outfits receiving mixed reviews. I hope she had a personal shopper checking out the New York Spring shows (and if she doesn't have one, I'd like to apply for the job) because there was more than enough First-Lady-ready fashion on the runway. In fact, given all the ladylike pretty the New York designers produced, one could assume they were all auditioning for the role of 21st Century Oleg Cassini. (For you young things, Oleg Cassini was Jackie Kennedy's "official" designer, although I have read that he also served as a cover so that she could wear the French designers she preferred.) Michael Kors Spring 2010, with the exception of the plastic cut-out numbers, would be great for a lady-representative-on-the-go, being so neat and all, not to mention that the shift-dresses are that gentle A-line that looks good on everyone. Brides shopping at Kleinfeld take note.

Here are some of my imaginary personal shopper picks:

Gary Graham Spring 2010

Barbara Tfank Spring 2010

Christian Siriano Spring 2010

Milly Spring 2010

Isaac Mizrahi Spring 2010

Lela Rose Spring 2010

Ralph Rucci Spring 2010

Stephen Burrows Spring 2010

All these looks would work for the modern wife of a President, Prime Minister, Senator, Congressman or King. First of all, these outfits are all quite lady-like (okay, the Milly skirt could use an inch or two or three), and we want our First Ladies to be ladylike, don't we? I mean, consider the alternative, although I think it's inevitable that Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan or one of the Kardasian sisters will become First Lady or a real princess, or worse, in the near future, alas. Second, many of these outfits come with co-ordinating coats or jackets, which both confer dignity and protect the First Lady from undignified drafts. Imagine not only being forced to sit through a lot of boring speaches but being seated beneath an air vent for the duration. Third, none of these outfits is a bright polyester pantsuit, that curse on American political women.

Besides, that Stephen Burrow's pant outfit is to die for, ain't it? That really looks like it was designed for Shelly O. I hope she takes the hint.

As for the rest of those looks, if no political lady wants them, I'll take them.

Clothes on Film on Project Runway

2009-09-26T13:58:00.000-07:00

One of film's great dresses on Gloria Grahame in "The Big Sleep"

Episode 6, Season 6 of Project Runway: the contestants were told to make costumes for films in five different genres, film noir, sci fi, adventure, period, and Western. Or maybe it was to make garments inspired by the costumes for the different film genres. Whatever their challenge, one thing was clear. The contestants don't watch enough movies. Apparently the designers who drew "Western" have never seen a Ralph Lauren collection, either.

Clair Trevor and Dick Powell in "Murder, My Sweet"

Three designers chose film noir as their genre, and heaven only knows what they thought film noir is. Films of that genre (although some critics claim that film noir is a style influenced by German Expressionism, not a genre) are usually about middle or lower class people doing sleazy things, and while gowns make an appearance, usually on the femme fatale or good-bad girl working in a nightclub, the iconic film noir look is simple, a dress or a blouse and skirt. That's the approach costume designer Renie Conley took when, at age 80, she designed the wardrobe for Body Heat, the 1981 movie in the film noir style.

Jane Greer and Robert Mitchum in "Out of the Past"

One designer, Althea, kind of got it, although her design looked like the outfit a film noir character would wear after she got thrown out of a speeding car. Irina's design looked like a nightgown, which could have worked if she left off that mysterious white tent. Louise's design was just confused, which surprised me because she usually wears vintage-inspired clothes, which I assume she makes herself. The dress she wore for the judging was great, not that I can find a picture of it online.

Veronica Lake in "This Gun for Hire"

However this Episode did give me an excuse to post pictures of some of my favorite film noir actresses looking good in high contrast. Audrey Totter, shown wearing a fur coat, practically made a career out of being the bad girl who would do anything for a mink.

Lisabeth Scott in "Desert Fury"

Audrey Totter and Ray Milland in "Alias Nick Beal"

I totally didn't get two of the judges' top three picks, Epperson's and Christopher's. Epperson's genre was Western, and his design might work for, say, a punk biker Western. Shootout at Thunderdome, perhaps? Many viewers thought Epperson should have won this episode, but the raggedy-uneven whatever didn't do it for me.

Christopher did a period look. For a vampire wedding; his description. Thank goodness he qualified the character and the look, because then this outfit might fit in, say, a Van Helsing type of period movie. Otherwise it's from a period on another planet. A lot of viewers really liked his garment. I bet they liked Van Helsing, too.

My favorite design was Logan's. He chose action-adventure, and I can actually see Angelina Jolie stuffed into this outfit for Tomb Raider 3. Poor Logan is getting a lot of grief on the interwebs because he's straight and because he designs clothes that look like, well, clothes. Hang in there, Logan! I'm a fan.

NB: I wrote a post about Karen Walker's Prisoner-inspired collection; now IFC is rebroadcasting the entire Prisoner series. This time, I get to see it in COLOR!!! Damn, I'm old.

Emmys, Schmemmys

2009-09-21T21:03:00.000-07:00

So I turned on E!'s barely watchable Emmy Red Carpet coverage (since E!'s decided to clean up its pre-show coverage by getting rid of every vaguely interesting host, the shows get worse with every award), and I looked at Yahoo's and Style.com's red carpet slideshows, and I came to this conclusion:

People dressed in satin ballgowns, major bling or black tie in the middle of a hot, sunny, Los Angeles afternoon look RIDICULOUS. Ah has spoken.

I am sick to death of ill-fitting strapless gowns, one shoulder gowns, wrinkled satin gowns, flesh-colored gowns, adult prom dresses and faux wedding gowns.

Here are a few dresses I liked, including, in spite of myself, a couple of one-shouldered items.

Mila Kunis in Monique L'Hullier

Jennifer Carpenter in Zuhair Murad

Kristin Chenoweth in Zuhair Murad

Holly Hunter in Georges Hobeika

Chloe Sevigny in Isaac Mizrahi

There are some definite themes here: light, shiny, and Zuhair Murad, who was unknown to me. Must check out his shows, because, like Rainman and ravens, I like shiiiiny. My favorite dress, though, was the Monique L'Hullier worn by Mila Kunis: it's kinda Goth, kinda pink (Goth dried-blood pink),kinda different, and not, thank the fashion gods, satin. Good work, Mila!

As Promised -- Pretty in Pink!

2009-09-20T13:42:00.000-07:00

Pink is everywhere on the New York runways this season, and there's a version of pink for everyone.

Tori Burch -- Pink for the Ladies That Lunch

Mulberry -- Pink for the Daughers That Brunch

L'Wren Scott -- Bombshell Pink

Lela Rose -- Working Girl Pink

DKNY -- Cocktail Pink

Devi Kroell -- Pink for the Fashionista

Naeem Kahn -- Uptown Girl Pink

Marc by Marc Jacobs -- Downtown Girl Pink

Zack Posen -- Star Trek Nerd Pink

L'Wren Scott -- Red Carpet Pink

Douglas Hannant -- Goddess Pink

What a nightmare for the Goth girl, eh?

Forget the Ugly

2009-09-17T12:32:00.000-07:00

Not to long ago I was bemoaning the look of the Twenty-Zeros, which I summed up in a single word: ugly. And then WHAT does the American Fashion Industry do? It beats me over the head with the pretty stick during New York Fashion Week. My only complaint now (and you knew there had to be a complaint, didn't you?) is that I've downloaded a whole mess of pretty and I don't really know how to divide it up to write about it, although a post titled "Pretty in Pink" is inevitable. I guess I could continue on in that vein: Pretty in Prints, Pretty in Blue, what have you. And I probably will, now that I think of it, because I thought of it and I'm lazy. Anyhoo, here's a sample of the water in the pretty pond:

Barbara Tfank Spring 2010 - Pretty in Pink

Oscar de la Renta Spring 2010 - Pretty in Blue

Reem Acra Spring 2010 - Pretty in Prints

Lela Rose - Pretty in the White House

Isaac Mizrahi - Pretty on the Red Carpet

Look at that -- waistlines in the right places (more or less), decent hemlines, pretty pretty colors, easy to wear shapes, sleeves. Sleeves! Be still my heart!

The various Vogue commentaries say that the explosion of pretty is a result of the economy: designers want to make things that will sell, i.e., clothing that will appeal to adult women with discretionary income and jobs. Well, these clothes make me want to shop, which I haven't really wanted to do in about a year. So good on the designers, they've reeled in at least one fish.

"The crotch on those pants is insane!"

2009-09-16T18:16:00.000-07:00

I knew Michael Kor's description of some Project Runway creation was accurate, but I didn't know it was prophetic. According to any number of New York designers, insane crotches are the mode du jour.

Helmut Lang, Spring 2010
(Damn this is scary!)

Max Azria, Spring 2010

Catherine Maladrino, Spring 2010

Marc Jacobs, Spring 2010

Davidelfin, Spring 2010

Who knew that vraka and shalvar would take the runway by storm? More important, who the hell thought this was a good idea??? Shoplifters? An enterprising thief could carry out an entire wardrobe in the pouch produced by these pants. And these pants, once the style trickles down to the common folk, would probably appeal to people (and the occasional cartoon character) who currently favor sweat pants. This pouch could accommodate an even larger pooch. Oh, the humanity!!!

BTW, that person in the green suit is a dude, right? I'm all for equal opportunity fugly clothes.

WWTSW, redux

2009-09-15T08:52:00.001-07:00

All Julian Louie Spring 2010

I don't really see La Swinton in a mini-skirt or a see-through shirt, but I'm sure the girl could pull it off if she wanted to.

Anyway, Julian Louie's Spring collection is full of clothes in the most beautiful sherbert colors. Enjoy!

Primavera

2009-09-15T09:16:00.000-07:00

This is the first year, in all the years I've been reviewing the collections at Style.com, American Vogue's website, that I've bothered to read the runway reviews. This is what Vogue's review says about Diane von Furstenberg's Spring collection: "This season's nomad searcher is 'looking into antiquity for effortless beauty,' with Egypt and the desert on her horizon, along with a side visit to the Pre-Raphaelites." But it seems to me that there's another obvious reference that Vogue, and perhaps DVF herself, overlooked, and that's Botticelli's Primavera. Let's compare and contrast, shall we?

Flowing drapery, check; floral print, check; flowers in the hair, check, golden glow, check. All we're missing is a few cherubs and a green god standing in for a wind machine to get a whole Renaissance Faire. But whatever the inspiration DVF's collection is full of teh pretty (more about this Season's sudden explosion of pretty later) and I like it, even though I'd look like a jackass if I tried to wear it. Alas, my flowers-in-the-hair days are long over.

I think our girl Rachel Zoe would like this collection a lot. It suits her bohemian aesthetic (anyone else notice how often the contestants on Project Runway used the word "aesthetic" last week? sheesh!). I can totally see her in the third look from the top, the one with the cap sleeves. She can look like the goddess Flora and keep her clavicles covered at the same time.

Anyway, enjoy teh pretty.

Nerds on the Runway

2009-09-14T14:27:00.000-07:00

The long-legged lady in the picture above is designer Karen Walker: she sure doesn't look like a nerd, does she? But according to her show's review on Style.com, the inspiration for Karen's Spring 2010 nautical-themed collection is the 1967 television series, The Prisoner, one of the cultiest of cult shows ever made. The series was surreal, nonsensical, full of symbolism, vague and unresolved, and so destined to be much loved by nerds. Now, I am a complete nerd (in fact I had BBC America's Dr. Who playing in the background while I reviewd the recent collections) and I lurved The Prisoner to the extent that I would sit with my hand on the television for an hour to improve the reception in my Connecticut home of the New York station that first broadcast the show in the U.S. However, if I had legs like Karen, I'm not sure I couldn't have found something better to do . . .

Anyhoo, compare the collection to the inspiration:

I am not a number, I am a well-dressed free man!

Be seeing you!

AMC has produced a mini-series based on the original 1967 series, to be broadcast in November, 2009. This nerd will reserve her judgment, (although, how good could it be without Hotel Portmeirion, the Pennyfarthing Bicycle, or Patrick McGoohan), but I have a feeling that it may come up short in the snappy clothes department. Too bad. Loved those capes and boat shoes.

WWTSW?

2009-09-13T13:37:00.000-07:00

What would Tilda Swinton Wear? -- out of the New York Spring collections? My vote is for Jeremy Laing. I particularly like the second look, which looks like it might be worn by a Roman senator going out to play paintball. Or maybe install a hardwood floor. Anyway, it's a perfect look for a six-foot tall androgynous red-haired woman, doncha think?

Green Design at N.Y. Fashion Week

2009-09-12T12:04:00.001-07:00

All Alabama Chanin Spring 2010

And now for something completely different ... I'm just going to quote the Style.com review of Alabama Chanin's line:

Natalie "Alabama" Chanin does good work(s). She compiles oral histories of Southern textile workers, salvages old quilts, and is striving to make her business zero-waste. All of the stitchers who create Chanin's (quite literally) homespun garments work from their own houses and live within an hour-and-a-half radius of her family and business base of Florence, Alabama. And they use organic materials grown and produced in the good ole U.S. of A.—a fact proudly announced on the Alabama Chanin label. Is it any wonder she's a Fashion Fund finalist?

But y'know what attracted my attention first? The shoes. (Alas! No detail shots yet!) Shoes a woman could walk in, or, if necessary, run away in. Good on you, lady.

It's Fashion Week Month, AGAIN!

2009-09-11T09:57:00.000-07:00

All Lynn Devon 2010

It's baaaaaack, that orgy known as Fashion Week. In New York, then London, then Milan, then Paris, and if you're really masochistic you can hang on for Los Angeles and Melborne. Mama Mia.

Anyway, the few collections from the first day of the New York collections just remined me why I like vintage, but Lynn Devon's collection really caught my eye. For one thing, it's full of grown-up clothes, so I could actually wear them if I were so lucky to get my hands on any, and they also have a vintage flair. Then I read the review of her collection and saw that her influences were Roman Holiday-era Audrey Hepburn and classic American designer Geoffrey Beene. Well, no wonder I like it!