Teh Last of the Pretty

For the time being. Anyhoo, I give you -- Pretty on the Red Carpet! Some of these looks are probably too low-key and pretty to be worn by actual celebrities, but what the heck, I can dream that some starlet out there will decide that she doesn't want to look like either ho or a float in the parade. However, if one of them should have Rose Parade fantasies, I hope she goes as a Marchesa float . . .

Douglas Hannant Spring 2010

Adam Spring 2010

Carlos Miele Spring 2010

Carolina Herrera Spring 2010

Isaac Mizrahi Spring 2010

Naeem Khan Spring 2010

Stephen Burrows Spring 2010

Zac Posen Spring 2010

Marchesa Spring 2010

Marchesa Spring 2010

I wish that bustle-like swag in the back of that blue and white dress by Douglas Hannant was a real bustle, because that poof doesn't entirely make sense floating between the model's butt and knees. Otherwise I love that entire look, messy hair and all. I can imagine the model as some turn-of-the-century party girl, wandering the garden of a debauched robber baron in the moonlight, stoned on laudanum and champagne, right before meeting a fate worse than death. Now, that's a dress!

The gold gown by Naeem Khan shouldn't be worn for real without a full-length lining, but I'm pretty sure that someone will wear it completely unlined. The Stephen Burrows dress is fresh and happy, but I'm equally sure the very convetional fashion police would hate it. The super-sculptural violet Marchesa probably isn't meant to be worn at all, or at least not worn by a mortal woman who sits down, eats, drinks, or wishes to go to the lady's room without the assistance of two maids. It's a fabulous piece of work, though, isn't it?

Pretty in the White House

Jason Wu Spring 2010

Fashion Week Month is over, or almost over, and I've only just peeked at the London, Milan and Paris collections. The designers showing in those cities are still doing edgier looks, which, frankly, look a little five minutes ago to me. Fashionistas been parading around in origami-ed, asymetrical, sheer, crotch-revealing creations for several years now, and it's time for teh pretty everywhere.

Meanwhile, Shelly O has been out and about, with her outfits receiving mixed reviews. I hope she had a personal shopper checking out the New York Spring shows (and if she doesn't have one, I'd like to apply for the job) because there was more than enough First-Lady-ready fashion on the runway. In fact, given all the ladylike pretty the New York designers produced, one could assume they were all auditioning for the role of 21st Century Oleg Cassini. (For you young things, Oleg Cassini was Jackie Kennedy's "official" designer, although I have read that he also served as a cover so that she could wear the French designers she preferred.) Michael Kors Spring 2010, with the exception of the plastic cut-out numbers, would be great for a lady-representative-on-the-go, being so neat and all, not to mention that the shift-dresses are that gentle A-line that looks good on everyone. Brides shopping at Kleinfeld take note.

Here are some of my imaginary personal shopper picks:

Gary Graham Spring 2010

Barbara Tfank Spring 2010

Barbara Tfank Spring 2010

Christian Siriano Spring 2010

Milly Spring 2010

Isaac Mizrahi Spring 2010

Lela Rose Spring 2010

Ralph Rucci Spring 2010

Stephen Burrows Spring 2010

Stephen Burrows Spring 2010

All these looks would work for the modern wife of a President, Prime Minister, Senator, Congressman or King. First of all, these outfits are all quite lady-like (okay, the Milly skirt could use an inch or two or three), and we want our First Ladies to be ladylike, don't we? I mean, consider the alternative, although I think it's inevitable that Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan or one of the Kardasian sisters will become First Lady or a real princess, or worse, in the near future, alas. Second, many of these outfits come with co-ordinating coats or jackets, which both confer dignity and protect the First Lady from undignified drafts. Imagine not only being forced to sit through a lot of boring speaches but being seated beneath an air vent for the duration. Third, none of these outfits is a bright polyester pantsuit, that curse on American political women.

Besides, that Stephen Burrow's pant outfit is to die for, ain't it? That really looks like it was designed for Shelly O. I hope she takes the hint.

As for the rest of those looks, if no political lady wants them, I'll take them.